Tuesday, September 13, 2011


Wow It's been a long time since I've written a blog! I miss it. I finally got a new lap top (thanks Dad :) ) so now I'll be able to write again! So much has happened since I wrote last! I'm back at school now. Oh, and, I'm twenty! :) I love saying that. I love when people ask me how old I am. Twenty sounds so good! Love it. Okay......where to begin..???

Lately I have been learning a lot. Learning about everything. Myself, my friends, my family, everything. I am a very impressionable person so I have to be careful who I surround myself with. I've learned a lot about my friends. Who's really there for me, who's fake, who will stab me in the back, who I can trust. It's a hard lesson but it's a good one. For me, I can't let people go. I know when I need to let someone go and I know why, but I can't bring myself to do it. Friends, boy friends, anyone. Knowing that my time with someone has to end, it kills me. But I have recently found something to help me. Memories. The reason I love music so much is because you can hear a song and it can take you back to a memory, a time in your life you hadn't thought about til now. You can feel the emotion you felt, smell the smells, all of it! I always connect songs to people. Maybe it was just the popular song on the radio when we were hanging out, or maybe you made me a cd and my favorite song on the cd reminds me of you. Or maybe something sad between us happened, so a sad song reminds me of you. Whatever it may be, I absolutely love that music can do that. Memories can make things harder also, you can just live in memories and get stuck in them. Wishing they could happen again, wishing things were how they used to be. But that's not what they're for. Memories are for us to go back for a moment, and remember a face, a smell, a feeling, a place. When you have to let someone go, you keep all your memories with them. And that's what keeps you smiling. :)

Once someone hurts you, it's hard to let them back in. It takes courage and strength to forgive. When someone gets mad at me, I go crazy. It's the worst feeling ever. I'd rather have the flu and be throwing up all night than have someone be mad at me. It's just how I am. I love people. Being on the cash register at work is my absolute favorite place to be. I get to talk to people! People I don't even know. It's awesome. Sure we're only talking about food..but everyone has a story and maybe I can learn a little bit of theirs. So anyways, I love people. When a person is mad at me, I'll do anything to fix it. I've been experiencing this a lot lately for some reason and it's just awful. It's definitely not a fun spot to be in. Something I've learned through all of it though is to really really think about it before you do something, or say something. I know people say that all the time. "Think before you say something!" But don't let that go in one ear and out the other because our mothers have overused it and now we're numb to it. If only I would have thought about it before I said that, if only I thought about it before I did that. If only I thought about that person that I care so much about and would never want to hurt. I can't go back in time, but I can learn from this and think about things before I say them and do them and be more understanding of people's feelings. If I have hurt you, this is for you. You know who you are. I'm sorry, and I hope you have enough courage and strength to forgive me and let me back in. 


That's a tough one. It's something most people have a hard time with. Unfortunately, I don't. I trust way too easily. I just assume everyone is good, and I can trust them. But that is false. You can't trust just anyone. You can trust hardly anyone. You can trust in God. And that's about it. So I'm taking all of my trust, and putting it in Him. That's where it should have been all along. When you're sitting with someone and you're having an intimate one on one conversation, you trust them. Or at least I do. I don't think twice if they are going to share what I am saying to them with other people. I feel like you shouldn't have to say, "keep this between us" but I am learning with most people, you do. Everyone needs someone they can completely trust 100%. That's my mom. She's not the only one, but she's the one I've had the longest. :) I can tell her anything and everything. And she won't say a word to anyone. I completely trust my mom. If you don't have one of those people, you should find one. I definitely want to be someone that someone can completely trust. Sometimes we think we are trustworthy but we really aren't. Some of us don't even realize it either. It's something I am learning right now. You have to be someone your friends can trust, someone they can feel comfortable talking to. Telling you their deepest, darkest, secrets. Their fears and what makes them happy. Their goals and their dreams. Everyone should be that person for someone else. 

Today I found a bracelet that my friend Alyx bought for me. It says WWJD. What would Jesus do? Sometimes when I'm faced with a problem or I have to make a decision, I think, what would ________ do? But I never put Jesus in the blank. That's definitely something we all should do! But it's soooo hard. We actually probably already know what He would do but we push that thought over to the side and do what we want anyways. Jesus wouldn't take the easy way out. He wouldn't stop at the expected place. He'd keep going. So I don't think I'm ever going to take this bracelet off. It's such a great reminder. Would Jesus say that? Would He do that? Probably not, so I shouldn't either. Thanks Alyx. :)

Okay so can we pleeaasseee talk about how I am TWENTY! How does that sound coming out of my mouth?! I am in love with being twenty. Love. I don't know why but it's great. You're probably laughing at me or think I'm super weird but that's okay because I am super weird. So ha :)

I could literally sit here for like 4 more hours and write. I am loving it right now! When I was blogging about being the mom over summer, I would be excited about it, but sometimes I got lazy and I wouldn't want to. For some reason right now I feel like I could do this forever! You probably don't want to read 4 more hours worth of writing though. But I will definitely write again soon. But one more thing before I go....

I. Got. To. See. TAYLOR SWIFT.!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jkrbgrgbwkjbdksbktwuafbk!!!

Okay. :) Thanks for reading this whole thing! I'm glad you did. :) I didn't really go into this with a plan today, it was basically raw emotion, exactly what I'm feeling. So there it is. I'm going to make this a regular thing, so look for more posts soon. :)

His divine power gives us everything we need for life. 2 Peter 1:3

Sparkles and glitter, Ashley


Tuesday, August 9, 2011

It's been a while!

Hey guys! I know, I know, I haven't blogged in forever! The main reason is because my laptop doesn't work anymore :( it wont turn on. And I never come upstairs and use this computer..but for now it's all I've got! I miss writing and checking back every five minutes to see if i have any comments or new followers! It's a lot of fun :) I need to get back into it!

Well summer is sadly coming to an end. It's still nice warm weather but school has begun! School for me will start next Tuesday. I'm super excited actually. Im looking forward to going back and learning! I feel like my brain is turing to mush. I. Need. School. Neverrrr thought I'd ever say that!! Hopefully I will get more classes next semester and be able to transfer from Delta soon. I want to go somewhere by the beach like San Diego :) Sounds lovely! Getting out of Lodi for a while sounds really nice and refreshing. My mom wants me to go to William Jessup in Rocklin and I have thought about that but the ocean is calling my name :) Studying on the beach? Check yes.

A lot has changed around here! We have two new brothers now. Carson and John are finally here. And let me just say, whoa. Not what I expected at all but in all honesty I don't know what I expected. I think I just thought they'd come here, act like normal, well behaved kids. Learn English quickly, and we'd go on with our lives just like before. No. Not quite! It is very interesting having them here. I;m not exactly sure how to describe it. John is sweet, he can be caring and compassionate. I haven't spent any great amount of time with either of them. I mean, when I'm home they're here obviously. But they are on strict, structured schedules so they are doing something. They always make sure to say hi and good bye to me when I leave or come home. And they really like to hug. I understand they like to be loved but you can't just haaang on me, I mean, I need my space. I like my space. lol Carson is different. He acts a lot younger  like 3ish. Kinda just waddles around mumbling weird things and making noises. But hey, they've got a house to live in, brothers and sisters to play with, and loving paretns who are doing everything they can to make their lives better. :)

I've gotta go pick up Emily from school now, we're going shopping :) Sorry it took me so long! I'll try to blog again soon :)

Lip gloss & Nail Polish, Ashhhh <3

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

They come home TONIGHT! kdgbkrbvkbgohbsd!!!

I. Am. So. Excited.

Words can't describe. I can't wait to walk down the hall and ask my mom if my outfit looks okay. I can't wait to say MOM again! Ahhhhhhh! <3

The boys are finally here. They are going to sleep in their new beds tonight in their new jammies! This is beyond exciting. Like I said, I don't have words.

The kids are giggling with excitement. When I got home from work at 7 Charlie ran up to me and asked if we were going now lol. Their flight actually got delayed to it's going to be later than expected. We have a long night ahead. But it will be worth it! :) Can't wait.

You haven't really missed much...I worked all day today and a little bit yesterday so Emily has been doing her time. Now that she's home I'm trying to pick up on lost hours from last week. One week off work sure does some damage to your pay check. That's okay though..I'll just have to lay off the shopping for a little bit. As tough as that is for me....! I have a small problem. Some may say it's an addiction. I just like to have new things :) I'm a girl, I'm allowed to love shopping. So ha. I do need to save money however..I have to move out some day.....

Well folks....there's really not much else to say except I will no longer be the head hancho. Ladies and gentlemen, lil mama will be off duty in less than 5 hours. I repeat, fiiivveeee hours. It's bittersweet actually. I will miss the boys coming to me when they need something, calling my name instead of mom or dad, asking me if they can do this or do that. But, at the same time, I will not miss the boys coming to me when they need something, calling my name instead of mom or dad, and asking me if they can do this or that. So yeah. I think that sums it up......

Now....I know all of you faithful readers of mine are expecting me to keep this blog up even when my parents get back....and I am here to tell you that....I will! I am not sure what I will write about all the time..obviously at first it will be about our new life and how everyone is adjusting. But after that, I guess we will see where this takes me! It is kind of exciting to not have a plan for it but to just let it unfold itself. I am looking forward to it and I hope you are too. Thanks so much for all your prayers and support during this journey. Thank you to everyone who brought us dinner. And thank you to everyone else who has been a part of this adoption adventure in any way. You all mean so much to us <3 This is the end of the road for lil mama's mommy blog, but...every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end...:)

Ribbons and pearls, Ashley

Monday, July 25, 2011

Two More Sleeps!

As Charlie likes to say! Yay! This is the home stretch. Our parents and new brothers come home Wednesday night! The house is filling with excitement. And I am so ready for my Mom to come home and be the Mom! This was a great experience for me, I am fully prepared to be a mom...but I think I was already prepared...lol...Don't worry though I won't be having kids for a long time. Time sure is flying though! I will be 20 in September and I can not wait!!! It's time to start buckling down on school and getting out of Delta! I have been thinking about where I want to transfer but I still don't know exactly what I want to do....it's really hard to decide...=/

The kids have been pretty good. Garrett has turned into the sweetest, cutest, well behaved little boy! He is not a baby anymore. Not that he wasn't all of those things before, but he's really grown up. Charlie on the other hand has been acting up lately. I think he is just having a hard time...he's a daddy's boy and is very attached to him. I'm sure he will be just fine once mommy and daddy are back! Alright so here's a quick update:

The farmers market was an adventure. Ahhhhhh. Taking the two boys anywhere is hectic but I think they were trying to make this trip extra special if you know what I mean. Garrett never wants to stay in the stroller but I made him. Charlie doesn't like holding anyone's hand but he has to because there are way to many people for him to be walking alone. Then I got them a snow cone and Garrett spilled his everywhere and freaked out. And he dropped his spoon. Freaked out some more. By the end of the night I was more then ready for them to go to sleep! So that was the farmers market. Yesterday we got up early and went to church and after that we had lunch and I took the kids to Lodi Lake to play. The boys love playing at the park. They never want to leave but it was pretty hot so we only stayed for a little over an hour. That was pretty much it for yesterday. Today I worked so Em watched them and when I got home I took them swimming. We haven't swam for a while so they loved that! We will probably swim again tomorrow after I get off work. It's nice to be back at work makin some money!! :) Alright well I have baths to give and jammies to put on. Thanks for reading!

Giggles and Tickles, Ashley


Thursday, July 21, 2011

Time flies!

Time is literally flying by. I think it's because my mom has given me a round about day that they might be home, hopefully next Wednesday or Thursday. I just didn't think it would come this fast! It's been easy so far..but I've been doing lots of laundry and dishes and cleaning! Emily...come home!! She was my cleaning lady that never went home. haha ;) They will be back sometime Saturday night. Then Tyler will go to my Nana's and Sarah is spending the night at her friend Samantha's house. Team Ashley and Emily will be back soon :) 

Yesterday we hung out at home, did some cleaning. The boys have been watching the Incredibles. Over, and over, and ovveerrrr. I don't understand how kids like watching something a million times! I told Charlie we have to pick a different movie today because I am getting sick of it! When I pick movies for them I usually try to find one they haven't watched in a long time. They prefer the one that just ended five minutes ago. Whatever floats your boat! We got to do some errands yesterday. I had to pick up my check from work and deposit it at my bank. Sarah stayed in the car with them and they just watched a movie. Waaay easier than getting them in and out of the car. Gotta love the built in dvd player. When we got home Leonda brought us some delicious De Vinci's for dinner. Nana wanted us to come over for dinner so we took it to her house and ate and played outside with Nana...
I used to walk around this when I was a little girl, it's a big flower bed in their front yard. Memories of playing outside were flooding my mind as I walked around it yesterday. I've gotten a little bigger...

 We stayed at Nana and Papa's house til about 9 and then we came home. The boys got pretty sweaty playing outside so I was planning on getting them right in the bath when we got home and then off to bed. They had a different plan however, before we reached the end of my n & p's street both of their heads were tilted down and eyes closed. I guess they were tired! Good thing for me :) Even though I hate putting them in bed without a bath, I did not want to wake them up. They're so precious when they're asleep. It was just about bedtime for me too! I was pretty tired! 

Today it's really nice out but it's already starting to get hot =/ It feels so nice in the morning, I wish it would stay like that all day and I could leave the windows open. I just gave the boys a bath and got them dressed for the day. Charlie is watching cat in the hat and Garrett is playing with Sarah. Tonight is the farmers market down town so I'll prob take them to that. Charlie likes jumping in the bounce house and they like snow cones. We'll see how it goes! I wont be taking the stroller however because I end up pushing Garrett's backpack instead of him. It might be hard to keep track of both of them though...hmmm..I guess we'll see what happens! I'll be sure to let you know how our evening out goes. Wish me luck? 

Bubble bath and baby lotion, Ash 

I already posted this blog, but as I'm cleaning up after lunch and still haven't showered yet & in my pj's, I wanted to add something:

Being a "mom" there's always...........
A dish to be washed, a dishwasher full of dishes to unload, rules to be made, a spill to be wiped up, crumbs to sweep, food to be made, clothes to fold, laundry to put in the washer, baths to be given, diapers to be changed, noses to be wiped, hands to wash, arguments to be settled, "no's" so say, teeth to be brushed, beds to be made, hair to brush, stories to read, tears to wipe away, band-aids to put on, giggles to listen to, messes to be cleaned, questions to be answered, and cheeks to kiss :)   

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

lil mama's back in business :)

Hey everyone! I know I haven't written a blog in forever. But, our parents are back in "U" and I'm in charge again! Emily and Tyler are in Orange County on a missions trip so it's just Sarah, the boys, and me! That doesn't mean the house is any less loud however. Charlie and Garrett can make enough noise to sound like there's 10 kids here!! I don't know why boys have to be so loud. They can't just sit and play barbies like girls..they have to slam cars together and make the trains fly off the table and run and scream. I'll never understand boy brains. They aren't much different when they get older either! Okay, enough about boys..

Yesterday was a very lazy day. We watched movies and just hung out at home all day. Today I decided we should actually do something so I got up and got ready and then we got a surprise visit from Uncle Mark and all our cousins! They brought us pizza and hung out with us for a little bit. It was so good to spend some time with them! :) Then we packed up some snacks and waters and went to Lodi Lake. We stayed there for almost 2 hours and they still didn't want to leave! There was only one other kid there besides Char and Garrett so they had the park to themselves but Charlie kept complaining that there weren't any kids to play with. One kid would leave, then another one would come. But it was a very quiet day at the park! It was really nice too! Not too hot, cool in the shade. However, the boys still managed to get as sweaty as possible. Those too sweat more than any other kid I've seen. After they played and got tired out ;) we went to Target to get Icee's and water bottles. I have a really annoying cough that wont go away and I get intense cough attacks throughout the day where I literally have to drink an entire bottle of water. I drink a lot of water every day, I suppose it's a good thing but we run out so fast! I've been taking nyquil at night so I can sleep but I still wake up coughing and have to sleep slightly sitting up. It's a pain!!! Hopefully it goes away soon and no one else gets it! 

Today I found out my parents might be home as soon as next Wednesday! Woo hoo!! That would be soo awesome. We all miss them already!! Also we are getting very excited to meet Carson and John!! :) Hurrrrry up passports! That is pretty much the only thing that could keep them there longer. I am ready to get back on our normal schedule and adjust to having two more brothers. 

Alrighty well I hope everyone had a lovely day, and I'll be blogging again soon! :)


Summer time & Sunshine, Ashley

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

I am so happy our parents are home!

But they have to go back soon ;( Hopefully they will only be there for 2 more weeks and then home for good! With Carson and John! Yay! I can't wait. We sure have been enjoying this time that they've been home. I am attached to my mom <3 I missed her so much and it was only three weeks! Our nana and papa took us too Aptos yesterday, it was a lot of fun! Lots of driving though and it wasn't a very smooth ride! They just bought a motorhome so we took that even though we just went for the day. It was an adventure! :) 

 Today we went all went to lunch at a mexican restaurant called miguels mmmmm delish. Then we went to target and walmart and we were like a parade through the store. Everyone was talking, the boys were whining or asking for something and it was a little hectic. But that's the way we like it isn't it mom ;) hehe..she was trying to tell me something and I couldn't hear her and she was just like never mind I'll tell you tonight when they're all asleep!!! haha....the glorious bedtime. Since my parents have been home I've been able to go off and do my own thing with friends since I don't have to watch the kids, but I've really just wanted to stay home! Even if I'm not in the same room with my mom, just knowing she's around here somewhere..I don't want to leave. lol I am kind of a baby aren't I? Oh well! She's great. However I have been shopping a couple times and it feels so great! I love shopping and kind of have a problem...I like to spend $$$...yikes! But new clothes are so much fun :)

Soooo I feel like I don't have much to blog about since they're here..My blogs will get more interesting once they go back and I'm mom again!

beach days & lemonade, Ashley

Friday, July 8, 2011

Day 19: Getting used to this, but kinda ready for it to be over....

Hey! Sorry I haven't been blogging every night...I am lazy lol. In fact, I wasn't even planning on blogging tonight but I was on facebook and a junior higher (I help out with the jr high kids at my church) messaged me and said, "Blog???" So I was like wow okay I guess I need to do one! She told me she reads all my blog posts and had been praying for my family. Thanks Hannah :) You're so sweet!! I have so many different people reading my blog of all ages and all over the world, I need to make sure I'm keeping you updated!

I have some exciting news: My parents are coming home tomorrow night for 10 days!!! They have a 10 day wait period so they are going to come back for that and then go back and get the boys! When they go back they should only be there for about a week. Phew. We are really getting down to the wire!!! The boys definitely miss them, a lot. But so do we!! Emily and I were just talking about it last night. I was like, Em, "I miss mom. I cried." And she was like, "I cried the other day too!" ;( I'm usually the baby out of the two of us. How am I ever going to move out..............hmmmm...guess I'll be visiting a lot?

The kids have been really good but Charlie has this not listening thing going on. He asked  me if he could jump into the spa today and I said no it's too shallow. So he did it. I was like, um, hello? Did I say no or........so I made him get out. He cried and crieeddddd. I talked to him a little bit about listening and about what no means...then I let him get back in. I'm not sure why he thinks even when I say no he can still do it. He knows he's going to get in trouble so is it worth it? I guess he'll learn. Garrett is good but he has an eating problem. He eats yogurt, peaches, yogurt, peaches, mac and cheese (on a good day), and yogurt. Oh and he eats peaches too. And sometimes yogurt. Soooo yeah. I offer other things. We had pizza brought to us tonight, thanks Marian! We all ate it and it was yummy! But Garrett wouldn't. So idk..I'll keep trying. I think he's going on strike. No parents, no food. haha maybe not....

Tyler has been with N & P and Sarah is at a friends house so it's just been Em and I. Pretty quiet for the most part, Garrett also hasa screaming thing going on. So annoying! But I'm sure he'll stop...eventually..
Sarah comes home tomorrow morning sometime and I'm sure my Nana will bring Ty sometime tomorrow afternoon. Our parents get home at like midnight tomorrow so everyone will be asleep. Em and I will probably stay up though! We are really excited.

Alrighty well I just had to get a quick blog in tonight. I'll write more later.

There you go Hannah :) Love you girly!!

X's and O's, Ash

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Day 17: New Friends

Alright, I need to get back on track with my blogging! I did so good in the beginning! I've been kinda slacking lately, sorry guys! Thanks for continuing to read my blog, even if it does take me a couple days to write! 

Yesterday was fun! I was off work so I went to lunch with my friend Emily, we've been good friends since 7th grade and now she lives in SF. It was soo good to see her and hang out again! We went to lunch and then did some running around. Then we came home and went swimming with the kids. That night she took her little sister and her friend to see transformers in 3D and I went with them. It was really nice to get away for a little bit! Also Emily got the boys all ready for bed, and put them to bed. So I was literally "off" yesterday! Thanks Sis :) Today I had to work 10-4 so Emily was on again. Sarah is a good helper though and she likes to play with the boys so they enjoy that. Garrett cries. A LOT. He woke up and played with Charlie and then all of a sudden he started crying and just wouldn't stop. I was getting ready for work so Em had to take care of him. It's hard to not get frustrated with him! But after he goes on and on and on and just doesn't stop..I mean enough is enough! We were loving on him and hugging him..trust me, the boys get plenty of love! They are so cute we can't help but kiss them or hug them every time we walk by them! He is just having a hard time. Charlie is doing great though!! He's really a good big brother. Char takes care of his little brother. When I got home from work it was super hot so we all went swimming and some kids that leave around here came over too. All the kids around here are really nice! There were 9 kids total but that's including Em, Sarah, Char, and Garrett. They are like 12-16 so they are good and they play with the boys too. It's nice having new friends and the kids really enjoy having other kids to hang out with. We are really blessed with the neighborhood we moved into :) Once they left we ate and it was time for the boys to get baths and head to bed. I threw a towel in the dryer for Charlie (every night...) and put Garrett in. He usually puts up a fight....this time he was alright but when it came time to wash his hair..he wasn't havin it. I don't get it. I've tried going about it different ways..singing..toys..NOTHING works! So whatever I just let him cry and get him out, lotioned up, and into bed. He literally fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow! phew. Char is always good about baths, teeth, and bed. Man..I am tired!! Work was pretty busy today and then I come home and be a mommy which as most of my readers know can be tiring! By the end of the night I'm tired of answering questions that most of the time I don't even have an answer for and I'm tired of picking up toys/clothes/swim toys or asking them to put them away. What is really irritating is when I have to ask someone more than once to put something away or do something. Twice is alight....but five times? Really? What is even more irritating is when I ask they say "I knooooow!" And then, guess what?!? They don't do it. So I ask again. Um, I thought you knew? Ha..guess not! So you do need me to tell you what to do after all! :) Right now the house is pretty clean, the little ones are asleep, and Em and Sarah are getting ready to watch a movie. I'm going to go watch the bachelorette when I'm done, yay! Emily finally went through the pics on my computer and deleted a bunch of hers so I uploaded a bunch, like I said I would! Enjoy! :) 

Ouchies and boogies, Ashley!

 Team Huddle!
 Char and his friend John

Garrett being patient waiting for brother!
 fam :)

best nana <3

 everyone on the 4th!

yes I have to plug my nose.................

 I just love this picture because Charlie's face is too cute and it displays Garrett's love for cake so well...

Hi I'm cute.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Day 15: Happy 4th of July! :)

Hey Guys! Wow it's been too long! I haven't been feeling well and I've also just been busy. Let's see....I have a lot to catch you up on! We've been taking lot of pics, especially today but my computers memory is full so I have to fix that before I can upload them. I hope everyone had a fun 4th!! We hung out at home today and Nana and Papa came over. Emily, Garrett and I went to the store this afternoon to get some snacks for today. Charlie and Sarah stayed the night at N's and P's last night and Sarah went again tonight. So we went to Raley's and bought a bunch of yummy food! Then we came home and cleaned the house and got all the snacks ready. Once they got here we all went swimming and the kids across the street came over and swam too. We played games in the pool and then they left and we ate. Yum! We had the yummiest cake ever. Chocolate pudding cake from Podesto's. Delish. I took a pic but I can't upload it to show you ! grrr makes me so mad! Wow...I'm going to hear fireworks alllll night huh! Okay..anyways..after dinner the kids swam til it got dark and then we did the sparklers. We realized we couldn't see the fireworks from our backyard like we thought we'd be able to so we rode out bikes down the street so we could see them. It wasn't as good as being at Lodi Lake but it was still awesome and so pretty. People all arounf our neighborhood had their own fireworks so after the big sky show we rode around and watched other people's. It was actually pretty cool! That's pretty much it for today..

The past couple days I've had a cold so I really didn't do much of anything. On saturday Charlie had his last T-Ball game so we went to that and he got a trophy. So cute. Pics will hopefully be up soon. Then I took the boys to Target to pick a toy. The night before they were having a hard time, missing mommy and daddy. Mostly Charlie..it's usually Garrett but this time Char was workin up the tears. It makes me sad and also wish that this process didn't take so long. They both picked out a car from the new movie Cars 2 (of course) and they repeated asked me to buy it. It just came out so it's gonna be a while before it come out on dvd but they don't get that. Garrett saw the wii game and was like, "cars dvd!!!" he's so funny. They had fun looking at all the toys at Target. Garrett calls it Targ. I love it!! I'm starting to call it that too :) Soo we came home and the boys played and then we took them outside to swim. I only had like 45 min before work so I swam a little and then laid in the sun for a while. When I came in to get ready for work I started not feeling well. That's when it all started. I must have sneezed like 238 times at work. No joke. It was so annoying, annnd I had to close so by the end of the night I was just miserable and came straight home, took a shower, took an allergy pill, ate my juice plus, and went to bed. I felt so much better the next morning! But we still skipped church which I was mad about because I really wanted some Jesus time! And worship time! I want to go to a concert soooon. Jesus Culture to be exact! :) Someday. I lazed around allll day Sunday. The kids swam outside so it was nice and quiet in the house! That was great. Im so thankful to have such a wonderful sister that helps me so much. Words can't describe how amazing she is or how much I adore her. She is my best friend. She's my everything! I would be lost with out her. I am sooo blessed to have her in my life. Alright, so, the kids came in after a while and I went to bible study with Kelly. I'm soo glad I have that to go to! I really need that in my life because I'm not in the bible like I need to be but it's something I am working on. I always feel good after my bible sesh with Kelly annnnd get this, no matter what kind of music I listen to on the way there, I ALWAYS listen to christian music on the way home. Every single time. But I need to be doing that anyways and not just because I had bible study so I'm on a Jesus high! I need to live my life for Him always and not just when it's convenient for me because I'll be honest with you, that's what I do. When it's convenient for me,I'll read in my bible. When I feel like it I will turn it to a Christian radio station. When I need something I'll pray or when I have some quiet time. But, being a Christ Follower isn't about me at all!!! It's all about Him. Alllll about bringing glory to God and honoring Him in allll we do! In the music we listen to and the words we speak and the things we watch and wear......everything.....funny thing is I know all of this. I just have a hard time doing it. I'll be right on for a few days..maybe even a week, praying every day/night, talking to God, reading His word. Then I'll slack off. So this is something I really need and want to work on! If you'd like to pray for me about this, please do! I know I kind of went off on a trail here but I'm glad I did and I just want to be transparent with you guys and tell you what's really on my mind and my heart. So here it is! Here I am. Take it or leave it. :) 

Love you all.

Fireworks & sparklers, Ash

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Day 11: Bring it on! I've got a stroller....

Yo! How are you guys doing? I hope you're enjoying my blog. I find out about more and more people that are reading it every day and it amazes me! When I started this I didn't think many people would read it. I did it more so that our parents could see what we're doing while they're gone. But it's so cool to know other people are reading too :) 

I worked today so Emily was back on duty. I always know I'm going to come home to a clean house when she's in charge :) I was right. Dishes done, laundry done, beds made, rooms clean. Oh yeah! Can't wait til she's older and we're roommates :) When I got home from work I went straight upstairs to hug and kiss Charlie and Garrett. It's so different now. Before, when my parents were here, I'd come home and go in my room, change, check my fb, and then come out and see the kids..Now, I got straight to them and smother them with love! I can't help it. It comes naturally. I played with them for a little bit and then we got ready and went to the farmers market downtown. We took the stroller for Garrett and it is thee worst stroller I've ever used. First of all, all of Lodi was there. It was crowded. People like to walk sllooowwwlllyy. Which is fine, whatever, take your time looking at all those peaches, they all look the same to me! Or at least scoot over so I can push the stroller that doesn't like to turn around you. But please, for the love of lip gloss, DO NOT STOP in FRONT on me!!! I will hit you with the stroller. Don't believe me? Boom. Oh sorry, was that your cute little flip flop I just ran over? Woopsy....I've got a whiney 3 year old and he wants a blue snow cone! Move it!! If one more person stopped in front of me.....Alright, I'm done :) So I got the boys snow cones and Emily and I got blended mochas.
 Garrett's blue tongue from his blue snow cone!

We walked around for a while, saw some friends, hung out, and then it was time to leave. I stopped and got milk and bananas on the way home, leaving Em in the car with the boys. So much easier that way. And then we came home. It was a little late and they were whiney, they hadn't eaten dinner yet. I quickly started some mac and cheese and they watched a movie. Garrett had a hard time tonight.....he hasn't been drinking milk and I think it's because someone accidentally bought reduced fat instead of 2%..I guess it tasted gross to him, he keeps saying, "it's yucky!" So today I made sure I got the right kind but he doesn't know that, he still wont drink it. Also, he hasn't been eating very well. He always eats his yogurt. But that's it. He ate mac and cheese tonight annnd asked for more, so I was happy!! But he was really crabby..he really didn't want a bath tonight. But I'm not the kind of person to skip a day of bathing. They get baths every single night! Stinky or not! He cried the whole time. I gave him a super quick bath and got him dressed and he kept crying and saying, "I want daddy I want daddy!!!" I was chatting with my mom on fb and told her, and even though it was late and way passed their bedtime she said to skype her so he could talk to Donnie. I thought that would make it worse but it did the complete opposite! He was so happy! After they said bye he was all smiles and went straight to bed with no tears :) Phew! Charlie asked me to read them a story so I read them Guess How Much I Love You. When I kissed them good night and turned off the light they said good night and were out! Yay! Thank you skype. 

But really, I'm ready for them to come home!! We all miss them so much. But not only that, seeing all my mom's pictures of her and Donnie with Carson and Ivan make us all that much more excited to finally meet them! I can not wait to meet my new brothers. I just want them to be home already! We are going to get some fabric and make them blankets and get their room all ready. Carson and Ivan, your brothers and sisters love you!! You will be home soon <3 

Snow cones & stroller fights, Ash

Day 10: Feels like day 100

Hey Everyone! I can't believe it's only been 10 days...it feels like it's been one month!! Everything is going so well. People keep asking me how it's going..how the kids are doing..to let them know if I need anything...honestly, it's going just fine! I'm not saying I don't appreciate the concern, because I totally do. I'm just so happy with how well everything is going so far. Now, we still have a long way to go. But we've got a good start :) Little things have happened...like the toilet in my bathroom is leaking..so I have to clean that every day. Also we have an any problem. The first night we left dishes in the sink with food on them and the next morning there were ants all over the sink. After that I quickly learned to wash the dishes every night. I should just do that anyways! So they stopped showing up in the kitchen but I'd notice a couple here and there and then Emily found a huge trail in her bedroom. Today I bought ant traps. Those suckers better DIE. Nothing else has really gone wrong..phew!

Alrighty...so today the boys got up pretty early ugh =/ I'm not getting used to that...! I got up and got them their breakfast and turned on their cartoons. I was just kinda lazy for a while..then I got into the shower and was going to get ready for work but when I got out I had a voicemail that I didn't have to go into work today! I was super excited that I could just do whatever I wanted today so we decided to go back to the mall. I know....we were just there yesterday but..we forgot to get the one thing we were supposed to get yesterday which was a pillow pet for Ivan since we got one for Carson a while ago. And also last night my mom told Emily and I we could get a pair of Toms Shoes and she would pay :) So we wanted to get them today! Emily and I got ready and got the boys ready and we went to Target first. Garrett calls it Targ. It's so funny when he says it lol. After our target trip we stopped for lunch. The guy in the taco bell drive through was extra friendly and Emily said he was staring at me as he was handing me my food but I wasn't even paying attention lol I was too focused on making sure the boys had everything and just other things..anyways she was laughing at him..poor guy ha..We ate real quick and then headed to the mall. First we went to the mall with the pillow pet store. Garrett fell asleep on the way there and I had to change his diaper..again...while he was sleeping...

We picked a pillow pet for Ivan and then went over to the other mall. Emily got some really cute Toms but they didn't have my size in any cute ones so I ordered some online. Here's a pic of Emily's!

Then we came home and the boys played outside for a little while and Emily cleaned out the car. How awesome is she!!

My best friend <3
                    Garrett had 3D chock glasses on :)

            Then we came inside and the boys had a wrestling match...
 Garrett usually wins..........
 He's strong for a little guy!

 I decided to join in..
 Then we played dress up!

After that it was bedtime. They were pretty tired but Garret has been having a hard time. Charlie is usually really good about bedtime but he got up and came downstairs a few times..Garrett is fine once he's in bed but getting him there is the trick. He doesn't like his hair washed even though I am very careful and never get it in his eyes. Sometimes he doesn't even want to get in the bath so that's a struggle. I try to sing and play to make it fun. It works sometimes. When he starts crying I sing twinkle twinkle little star or itsy bitsy spider. Or winnie the pooh! He usually stops crying and sings with me. I learned that one from mom :) Also he really doesn't like his teeth brushed. But when he cries during that it helps me really get in there! Last night when he was crying he was saying, "I want mommy I want mommy!!!!" He was making me sad ;( I gave him a cute little polar bear book with a white, soft, fuzzy circle of fluff on it that he likes to touch. Distraction is key! It worked. I am always so relieved when they are in bed sleeping. Phew. We made it another day. :)

Rubber Duckies & Bubbles, Ashley

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Day 9: Rain...

Rain in June? What! So weird. Today was fun! I got to sleep in because Emily is here so she got up with the boys. We kinda just lounged around this morning and cleaned up a little..I watered the plants and put laundry away. Emily is back so there's finally laundry to put away haha! Once we all got ready we went to Nana and Papa's house to see their new motor home. She said they want to take us to Santa Cruz and spend the night..it sleeps 8. I can see that getting chaotic with all the kids and whatnot...but hey, why not! I'd love to go to the beach :) So hopefully that will be happening soon. Em and I left the boys there and went shopping. It was nice to hang out, just her and I. We went to forever 21 :))) it's the best. I bought a few things and got her a couple things too. I love shopping with my sister. Plus we can share clothes so I make sure I like what she picks out hehe. When we got back to Nana's and Papa's the boys were playing in the play room with Nana. They could probably play in there all day. Just something about Nana's house. We stayed for dinner and they ordered a pizza for us. We have the best Nana and Papa ever! After dinner they played some more and had some ice cream. Then we ran out to the car and headed home. It was pouring rain!! Garrett fell asleep on the way home so I had to change his clothes and change his diaper while he was asleep..he would not wake up! He will prob be up early tomorrow...that's okay because I have to work anyways. I let Charlie stay up a little but later and play. He is such a sweet heart. But he is growing up so fast!! I want him to stay 5 for a while....I like this age. But I always look at them and wonder what they will be like when they are older, like my age..I just can't imagine them any other age then what they are now! I am definitely ready for my mom and Donnie to come back..it's just weird being here without them. Plus I'm so close with my mom, I miss her a lotttt!! And I know the boys do too!! They are doing really well though! I try to keep them busy. I am learning a lot through this whole thing...I treat Charlie and Garrett like they are my kids..and I really want to know what people are thinking when we are out and about and I'm walking around with them, holding their little hands. Or putting them in their car seats in our SUV type car. I really want someone to say something like, oh your kids are so cute. Just so I can be like, you think I had a baby when I was 14? haha...people don't think I am 19 anyways. I get told that I look like I'm 16 all the time...I'll be 20 in September. But that's okay, I'll be forever young :) hehe okay, I'm rambling. Talk to ya tomorrow! <3

Rain drops & Lolli Pops, Ash  

p.s. I forgot to add this a few days ago when we went to walmart...they were watching cars on all the tvs lol :)

Monday, June 27, 2011

Day 8: Lil mama

So it's been a full week since our parents have been gone. So far everything has been great! The boys are doing good. Ty and Sarah are at Hume Lake. Luckies...and Emily got home today!!! :) I worked 12-4 today so Nana came over to watch the boys. She brought OJ and mopped :) Thanks Nana! It was nice to be back at work after having three days off. I missed my friends there! Oh! I have a cute pic of Charlie...I let him pick his shoes today...

After work I picked up Emily and ran up to her and hugged her forever and squeezed her little cheekies. She said I was embarrassing and her friends were like aw I wish someone did that to me! So ha! I just missed her okay. Jeez! Anyways..we came home and she went to sleep! It was like 5...and she's still sleeping!! That's okay because she can get up early with the boys ;) haha suckaaaa :p soo it was kind of a lazyyyy day. I had to get right on the computer to pick classes for the fall. I'm going back to Delta but since I didn't go last semester they pushed my date to pick classes back..so everything was full! So far I only have one class..I might get on the waiting list for a few more or I might just show up to some and just see what happens. As long as I do really well in this class I should have a better date for the spring semester. So while I was dealing with all that the boys were playing and being loud and running all over the house! I made pasta for dinner and we ate out back on the deck. It was nice but kinda windy! After dinner the boys had a bath and I got them ready for bed and put them to bed, but they weren't as ready as I was!
                                                              Garrett the carrot :)

It was 9:30..a little later than they've been going to bed..so I figured they would be tired. Nope. Obviously Nana didn't do a very good job at my "tiring out" technique...hehe..I had to come upstairs a few times and use my stern mommy voice. Finally they fell asleep. Little sweethearts. I totally missed them today at work. After spending almost every minute with them for three days, four hours without them was so sad ;( hahah oh gosh..listen to me!!! haha. So yeah..they're sleeping and I'm watching the bachelorette. Yep. I watch that. I don't watch much TV but I always watch this and the bachelor for some reason. I def would not ever do something like that..it's totally wrong. But I'm such a sucker for lovey dovey mushy sweetness, and this show is full of that cutesy romance. hehe. Anyways...lil mama is doin good! Thanks so much for all the prayers and love and support!!!! I really appreciate it. I love you all! :) 

Thomas and Friends, Ash

Day 7: Flexibility

Hey guys.  Phew...they are wearing me out! Yesterday I was ready for bed at like 3PM. No joke. It was an early morning and a busy day. I got up at 7 and woke Sarah and Tyler up..they got last minute things together for Hume and got ready..Garrett and Charlie were still sleeping so I woke them up and put them in the car in their jammies. Sarah and Ty had to be at church at 7:45. I dropped them off and rushed back home to get myself and the boys ready for church which started at 9. We quickly got ready, and made it just in time. I dropped the boys off at their class and scurried off to "big church". As I was walking up to the doors all the kids going to Hume came pouring out. Sarah ran up to me and gave me a tight hug. She was crying ;( I didn't even see Tyler..he was off with his friends. But Sarah was having a hard time. I knew once she left she'd be fine...but it's that leaving part. She was about to make me cry to I pried her off and sent her to the bus with her friend Haley and her mom. Before I knew it she was calling me and sending goofy pics from someone's cell phone on the bus. All better :) Church was good, Nana came too. The message was, If you're saved, you shouldn't act like someone who isn't. Totally true..Then I went to Sunday school and after that I picked up the boys. I was driving home and got the great idea of taking them to see Cars 2. Char had already seen it at his bday party but I thought Garrett would like it. So we went home for a little bit and then went to see it at 1:30 buuuut she said we would have front row seating. Everyone and their grandmas cat was at the movies to see this. The next showing was at 4 so I bought tickets for that one. That kinda messed up our plans thought because we were supposed to go to Nana and Papa's house at 5 for dinner. I called Nana and she said it was okay and to just come at 6:30. Flexible :) The boys were getting hungry for lunch so I took them to Fosters Freeze with my friend Adam. I was planning on getting them chicken strips since that's what they always eat there buuuuut they were out of chick strips. So I got them french fries and ice cream instead. Flexible :) That was quite the experience however, you eat outside there, flies everywhere, dirty tables, I noticed chocolate on Garrett's arm and got really grossed out when I realized we didn't order anything with chocolate......this was the very moment I decided I would never leave the house without wipes again. After we ate Adam left and we went back to the movies...by this time I had taken the boys in and out of the car 8 times. It gets tiring!! Poor things were falling asleep in the car but we were going to see this dang movie!!!

We parked, got out, (making it 9 times), and I was all happy feeling smart, thinking we were going to go right in and get good seats because I had already bought our tickets. Boy was I wrong. There was a HUGE line where people who had their tickets had to stand. And it was really hot. But we are flexible :) Luckily I brought water for the boys and snacks. We finally got in and stood in a extremely slow line for popcorn. I was really worried about our seats at this point. And I was right. Third row from the front, alllll the way at the very end of the row. But hey, we could definitely see it! And the boys still had a good time. Flexible :) After the movie I took the boys by Scooters (where I work) because I had to get my schedule. I took them in the back where we cook and into the walk-in. Garrett screamed and Charlie loved it and wanted to keep going into the freezer! But the walk-in is cold enough as it is. After that little pit stop we zoomed off to Nana and Papa's house. One we got there I planted myself in a chair outside and didn't move. I didn't even want to talk to be honest. I was straight POOPED. Funny how that happens....it was a long day after all. Nana made roast and potatoes for us but I wasn't even hungry =/ I ate a lot of popcorn at the movies. It's my favorite :) We stayed there til about 8 and then headed home. Charlie and Garrett got quick baths, teeth brushings, and story readings, and off to bed they were. They were both out within 10 minutes. Ahhhh. quiet time :) I thought it would never come! It was a great day thought, even with all the flexibilities. If everything went perfectly it would have been pretty boring! So that was day 7...stay tuned for today, day 8! <3

Popcorn and skittles, Ashley

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Day 6: Another one down

Well Today was a good day. I hung out at home with Garrett for most of the day. He is so good when it's just him. He's not bad when the other kids are home but he just does his own thing when he's alone and doesn't cry or anything. The house was peaceful today :) Then Charlie and Tyler came home. Bye bye peace and quiet. Hello loudness and arguing. Tyler and Sarah LOVE to argue with each other. They get at least one argument in every 5 minutes. SO IRRITATING. I'm looking forward to them being at Hume Lake for a week :) just me and Emily and the boys. Woo hoo! She comes home Monday evening :))) Yay. I try to stop and take a minute when they are really getting to me. I was playing out front with Char and Garrett...Sarah kept coming out there telling me something Tyler was doing. He took the lock for he suitcase or he wouldn't let her have any of the candy Nana bought or he took all the sun block. AH! I was soooooo sick of it. I tried ignoring them and letting them deal with it. I heard slamming doors and screaming from outside..so guess that didn't work. So like I was saying, I try to take a minute, ask Jesus to give me patience and wisdom to resolve the problem, and it really helps. Tyler and I don't get a long very well so I've been talkin to Jesus lots today!!! Maybe that's good? Anyways..he apologized. But it'll happen again. Maybe this week at Hume something will click for him. I hope so.

Charlie had a t-ball game this morning. It was so cute!! He only has one more :( I love watching them play. They all dog pile on the ball, it's hilarious. Some of them are actually really good though! I took some pics of Charlie..
                                                   He likes to slide into home!

                        Garrett got to play at the park with Tyler while Charlie played t-ball

After the game Charlie had a birthday party to go to and Tyler and Sarah went along to help out. Garrett was not very happy that he had to leave and Charlie go to stay at the party with all the kids. So I took him to get a cupcake at a cute little bakery..

Garrett played outside for a while and I skyped with my mom and Donnie and cleaned up a little bit. Nana came over to drop off snacks for the kids to take for Hume and did some laundry. Then it was time to pick up the kids from the party. Like I said...bye bye peace and quiet. Ty and Sarah had to pack for Hume and Charlie and Garrett played with their toys and watched sprout. I had to help Sarah pack because she forgets things :) and then we all went out front to play. My friend Nate just got a job at a pizza place and he delivers the pizza so I decided to order one for dinner! The kids enjoyed that. We don't usually get pizza from that particular place and I'm so glad I did this time! Tyler who doesn't even like pizza had three pieces! Or maybe that's because I haven't been feeding them. haha juuuust kidding ;) So yeah, thanks Nate! :) After pizza they played a little more (that was really just me trying to tire them out) we have an early morning tomorrow, the kids have to be at church for Hume at 7:45. Yay me. So I gave the boys a bath, brushed their teeth, and nighty night time for them. I'm starting to look forward to bedtime more and more. It's so nice when I'm the only one awake. I even sent Ty and Sarah to bed at 9. Do you hear that...? Nothing. So nice :) Alrighty well I'm off to bed. Thanks for reading :) Good night! 

Fruit snacks & Cherrios, Ash 

Day 5: Finally Bedtime!

Wow....I'm exhausted. I thought bedtime for the boys would never come. Today was a rough day. Charlie was pretty naughty...Garrett was good but before bed when he had to leave his movie to take a bath. he did not cry however when I brushed his teeth! Which is a first. So that was exciting!! Alright..I guess I should start at the beginning.....I got up at 6:15 and took Emily to Tokay..she went to Santa Cruz for cheer camp and is gone until Monday evening. Then I went back to sleep and Tyler went to Santa Cruz with the Anderson's..they picked him up around 8. Sarah came running into my room at 8:30 and said oh no I was supposed to be at church right now! She decided to start coaching for Mega Sports Camp (which ended today) so she got ready and was a little late. So I came home, got the boys some breakfast and got them dressed. They went upstairs to watch Thomas and I did some blogging and filling out papers for Tyler and Sarah to go to Hume on Sunday. I didn't know all the doctor info so I had to skype my mom which turned into a long skype sesh with the boys lol they always fight over who gets to be directly in front of the camera and they always touch it and move it to their face. So skype time with the boys is always super fun. I'm sarcastic by the way if you don't know me. Nice to meet you. :) After skype the boys had lunch and then we went swimming. Sarah went to get a manicure and pedicure with some friends (thanks guys!) Her nails are super cute!! 

When Sarah got home she came swimming with us. This is where Charlie started pushing it. He would let the goggles sink down to the bottom of the pool which he knows he's not supposed to. I don't like diving to the bottom...lol..he was just doing little things that he knows he shouldn't and when I would say no he did it anyway. He had a few time-outs. Buuut, we had a lot of fun taking pictures! :)

After we went swimming we came inside, threw some clothes on and went to the grocery store to get stuff for dinner. At the store I tried to put Garrett in the front of the cart but he wasn't havin that. I moved him to the big part and he did okay for a while but he wanted to walk around like Charlie so I got him out. Bad idea. They like to.....explore. Oh and just you wait til we got to the yogurt section. Oh boy. They went nuts! Garrett was putting gogurts into the card because lightening Mcqueen was on the box...Charlie was talking very loud, telling me what flavors he wanted. I was looking forward to getting to the check out.We finally escaped the grocery store and made it back home. Phew. I made chicken tacos but I started kinda late and I was ready for the boys to be in bed so I made them chicken nuggets and peaches. They like that better anyways! Oh, and we always pray before we eat......

"Thank you Jesus for dieing on the cross for our sins and for mommy and daddy bringing home new boys Carson and John. Amen"
"Thank you Jesus for Thomas and for..rifnkdsnbifeb.fnfou.dnowen.doewindw (no clue)..Amen."

I love it! <3 After dinner it was movie and bath time. Then brushed their teeth and finally off to bed. I read Garrett a story and he let me brush his teeth while he looked at a book. That's the trick! I kissed him good night and turned off the lights. Ten minutes later when I checked on him he was fast asleep! Charlie got out of bed once just to get something he wanted to sleep with and then he was out too. Tyler got home shortly after that with a bright red face. But that's all that got sunburned so not too bad...he said he reapplied sun block 3 times. Lucky bum got to ride the giant dipper today at the boardwalk! Fun! Nana said they might take us to the beach in their new motorhome when they get it. Woo hoo! Ty went straight to bed and Sarah and I cleaned the kitchen and did dishes. I was happy to turn off the lights and get into bed to write my blog. Ahhhh. Peace and quiet :) Well I'm off to dreamland..busy day tomorrow! T-ball at 9 and birthday party at 11. Good night! I'll write tomorrow!

p.s. I miss her.....

Sunblock and Floaties,